"Killing Fields" survivor shares her story

Well, hey everybody and welcome back to Qualified, the place where incredible people share their stories of overcoming great adversity and loss to inspire you and give you hope. I'm Michelle Heaton. Well, if you've listened to other episodes of the show, you know, I've interviewed people who have had heavy loss in their lives. You know that I call the podcast Qualified, because when my only child passed away at 17 years old, I didn't want counselling from someone who learned about grief from books, I wanted to talk to another parent whose child died. And throughout the years, I've discovered that people who have experienced great loss have much to share from what they went through. They're qualified by their life experience. And you also know that we don't just talk about the gravity and the sadness of loss. But each guest will also share the profound lessons that emerged from the pit as they crawled back into the light of day, eager to help other people who need it. And today's guest is no exception. She's definitely incredible. And she has certainly experienced great adversity and loss. And her story is one right out of the history books. She's a survivor of a mass genocide in Cambodia, the event that claimed 2 million lives. She's an inspirational speaker, and an award winning author of the book, how I Survived the Killing Fields. She's a co host on a weekly live show on Facebook. And she also owns and operates a wellness and coaching business Smart, Healthy living. Her name is Sara Im. And it is my honor and privilege to have her on the show today. Welcome to qualified Sara.

Thank you for having me, Michelle

of course. Sara, can you give us a brief explanation of what was happening in Cambodia back in 1975? And how you came to be held captive by the Khmer Rouge?

Sure, yes, in 1975. I was away from home for college. That was about 300 miles away from my hometown, from my family. I have loving family, my parents, and my three younger brothers. They all love me very much, and I love them. But while I was in college, this event took place. The communist Khmer Rouge took over Cambodia. And you probably have a chance to watch the movie The Killing Fields. When they came in, in the military style, and it went in, immediately, they pursued to evacuate all the people from the city to to leave everything behind. And they move us they they push us to keep going away from the city. So millions of people displaced all over the country. And I was struggling. Because I want to go home. You know, when anything bad happens to us. We want to be close to our family. In my case, I can't. There's nothing I can do. They shut down all the bus line the airplane, and there is no place for me to send a letter or a phone call. So I was miserably separated from my family. So to make the long journey a little shorter, I end up in a forced labor camp.

Thank you for providing that background, as hard as it is to hear and even to imagine. So you said you were struggling because you were separated from your family, which in and of itself is bad enough. But can you also describe the environment in that labor camp you were forced to live in?

They hold 1000 single man and woman and they push us to work in the rice fields in the intense heat of the tropical sun. And for four years. I live with very little food with little sleep and I contracted several diseases and when I got too sick to work they send me too The infirmary. They told me its the hospital. But when I got there, I realized it's not a normal hospital. It's the place where the sick people wait to die.

So knowing that this Infirmary was not a safe place for you, in reality, what thoughts were running through your mind at that time?

I was trapped. I don't know what to do. I cannot go back to work because I was too sick and I cannot run away because I don't know where to go and I might get shot. And if I stay, I will accumulate more diseases and I cannot survive. So this is when I saw inside to see what can I do to survive all I wanted just to survive, survive long enough so that I might have a chance to go back home to my family.

And you said your family was so important to you in the hope of seeing them again, was really the one thing that was keeping you alive. So tell us about that beautiful memory of your mother, and you as a young child, that you recalled to memory back then.

So I remember when I was were young, my mom read a story. That, in that story, show me that there is God. There is God that he knows what's going on. He knows the bad people and the good people. And in that story, God sent His angel to rescue children and women from the hands of a really cruel person. So from then, I already make up my mind. And I say this God. That's what I believe there is God bigger than anything. And when when my life is in danger, I remember back. In that night time, quietly, I start to pray and asking God to help me.

So in the midst of all this, you began to pray, and things did improve a little, which gave you hope. But then the situation took a turn again, tell us what happened next.

Well, then that one time, after I pray for four weeks, it's not just one time, one morning, when I woke up really early in the morning, before everybody else, I have an extra energy. So I decided to walk out from that infirmary. Then I walked by to the workplace. And I met a young team leader who is very caring and compassionate. And she took me in her group, and she, eventually she found me a job in the kitchen. She said, You are too sick to do anything. So you can go and help out in the kitchen. So that is the one action that was clearly, it was God because nobody ever have a job working in the kitchen, everybody was miserable in the rice field. So working in the kitchen, there's so many benefits, I got access to more food. And I have opportunity to work in the shade. And also less hours. So I had more time to sleep and more time to rest. gradually, gradually, I feel better. And eventually, I'm gaining some weight and then become a little bit healthier. So that's how I survived the first time from the kitchen, when they saw me look better, feel better, they wouldn't let me stay, then they pull me out from the kitchen, throw me by into the rice fields again. So my health started declining again. And I keep losing weight. But I endure for four years. Four years in this horrible situation. At the end of four years. They move the camp, they move closer to the jungle. So when I saw that, I realized that that's against my direction. My direction is to go back to my hometown. My hometown is not in the in the jungle. So I realized it's the wrong direction. I need to do something. So I feel like God gave me the courage to plan an escape.

In your book, you give more of the details. But can you just tell us who you were with how you managed to get away? And then where you ultimately ended up?

I gather three close friends to attempt a very dangerous escape. And we did it. We did it in the middle of the night in the middle of the jungle, very dark, because we had to do it at nighttime. And you know, jungle, there is no, no electricity is black. But God must have directed our path. We walk all night in the jungle. And when the sunrise again in the morning, we realize that we are out of the jungle. And then we keep walking, keep follow the path that people are walking, so we follow the path. And eventually we saw some people and we keep asking, I asked them for directions to go to my hometown. So eventually some people gave me the good direction, so I've just followed the direction. And then we keep walking. It's a long walk, long walk. But I in in the end, I find my family, eventually.

Well. That is an amazing story of perseverance and strength. And I know you're just summarizing it for us here and that the reality of it was so traumatic. So can you talk specifically about the losses that came as a result of all of this?

The greatest loss is the time, the freedom, we don't have any freedom, and, and we lost everything that be able to own and I lost my time with my family. Yeah, that's the precious time. Especially my mom was just recovered from four years of paralysis. She had an accident, before I went to college, she had an accident. And she became paralyzed. And I was the the caregiver because I was the firstborn. So I took care of her for four years. Four years, but maybe that's what God wants for us the time for us to build the relationship to build and strong one together. That's how I, I always remember the love for my family. And, and I will do anything to survive, just to go back to my family.

Those are tremendous losses that most of us can't even fathom, being held captive, losing four years of your life, your freedom, your possessions, and your family. That is so much loss. So several years later, you write a book about your experience in which you said that you believe your life was spared so that you can help other people. Can you give an example in all the public speaking that you do? Do you know of one or two examples of people that were helped by hearing your story?

Yes. One young lady was in my audience. When I spoke at the Rotary Club, seven years ago. And a few months later, I ran into her, I did not recognize her at all. Through a chamber of commerce and when and she pointed out to me when she introduced me herself, she said, Sara, I was in your audience. I will not never forget you. You saved my life. I was shocked. I said, how? Tell me. She said I had been suicidal all my life. But since I listened to your story and read your book, I am no longer that way. I have a new life now I hold on to this full time job. I have my own appointment. I'm a new person. Oh, I almost fainted. Thank you, Lord! Now a few months ago one of my friends from church bought my book when she read and then she sent to her mom in Pennsylvania who struggles with a chronic illness. But mom is in her 70s After reading my book, The mom, my friend, she said, after reading my books knowing how she'd gone through and all the horrible things she experienced. I feel like I can I move on I keep going, I can keep going.

Yeah. Well, I think it's just wonderful that you were able to help people by telling your story. And it's my hope that you're doing that right now by being a guest on the show. So Sara, you know that I always ask my guests to share the important lessons they learned by going through difficult and traumatic times in their lives. So what can you offer today to someone who's listening, who's hurting, and needs help to keep moving forward?

Yes, somehow, my life lesson is that, first of all, you had to have a purpose in life, the purpose that is bigger than yourself. For me at that time, my purpose was my family. It's beyond me, it's bigger than me. I did, I did not just want to live for myself. My life is for my family as well. And also the love, the love that, that I have in my heart, that keep me going. It helped me to endure, when you have love, love is such a strong, powerful feeling that helped you to endure the hardship that you otherwise you won't. So persevering. And it's so important, because I did not do well. I know what I want. I know I want my family. And I keep pursuing. So persevering. It's so important in our life, never to never think that it's impossible, will not be able to do it, then have some strong reason why you do it. The the love and the faith. I have faith that I believe that something better will come up . If you are struggling to keep going on. Think of something that you always wanted. Maybe your family, maybe your career, maybe your business, I don't know what you really want to reach? When envision that you will be able to reach it. Well, it requires you to keep doing it. If you give up, that's the end, you will not get it.

Gotta stay strong. Yeah. Well, Sara you wrote an award winning book, called how I survived the killing fields that captures your story. What was your purpose and writing that book? And also, how difficult was it to re experience all of this past trauma when you were trying to gather the information to the book?

Oh, thank you for bringing that book. That my first open door of my life to the world. And my purpose is to help people to have a better perspective on life. Because if you didn't know about how much I struggle, you probably think that you are the only person who struggles so much. But we all struggle, we all have our own unique story that we can share and support each other that way, we can encourage one another. So that's the reason why I wrote my book. over 30 years, I tried to push away more than 30 years. I didn't want to do anything above that. But when the time came, I had to try to remember I forgot a lot of them. Because 35 years it's a long time when when something impacted so much it's not really forgotten. It just buried a little bit deeper. Yeah. But once in a while when I get together with other Cambodians, we talk about our memories, we talk about our struggle, so we kind of help each other a little bit but within have that many occasion when when we got together we just talk about something else. We don't really want to talk about that.

Well Sara, it was an honor to speak to you, you shared so many important lessons with us that you learned through your struggles, you reminded us that family is so important, and that the love of family is powerful. You talked about perseverance, and the need for all of us to keep pressing into our circumstances, and not give up if we want to achieve what matters to us in life. And you emphasized the value of faith and the power of prayer, not just when things go wrong, but at all times in our lives, to be grateful and to appreciate what we have. Do you have any other final thoughts to pass along to us today?

Well, I just want to encourage everybody, that your purpose, your life purpose, your life is meaningful. And trust in the Lord He loves you, your faith is really important. If you don't have faith, you cannot go far. just knowing that the storm come and go. It doesn't lingering around too long. So just remember that way. Because I live in Florida, we have a lot of hurricanes. But we still alive, a lot of us are alive. It's only come one time, and then it disappears. So if we think about our life situation that way. We will be OK. The hard time will pass.

That's encouraging. Thank you, Sara. So I want to mention that in addition to your book, you also have a website where we can learn more about the coaching and speaking you do. So I'll link all that in the show notes for our listeners.

I also just added counseling to my service. Just recently, I realized that people need some help. If anybody would like to reach out, you can read my book and you can ask me to have you being a coach. I'll guide you. And I also have a podcast. So I appreciate that.

Sara, I just want to thank you so much for being here today. You inspired me. And I know that you help so many other people listening. So thank you so much for being here.

Thank you for having me. Thank you, Michelle.

You're welcome. So for those of you listening, I hope you were inspired by Sarah's story. In the middle of traumatic loss, it seems so hard to just put one foot in front of the other every day. You may be feeling that way right now. And it may feel like the sun will never shine again. But it will. Then like Sara- said it's a choice. No matter what you're going through. You can persevere and find joy again in life. And remember one day you too will be able to help someone else with the lessons you learned from your loss. Thanks for listening