Milestones, Memes and Memories

Well, Hey everybody. I thought I could get through today without doing this, but it turns out I can't. Today is Sean's birthday. He would have been 26 years old today. It'll be nine years next month, since he left this world to go to heaven. And my job on the podcast is to interview people about loss, to comfort others, with the comfort that I've received from God.

And I will press on and keep the faith because faith is what has sustained me all these years since Sean went to heaven. But today on his birthday, I feel weak. My heart hurts again.  And with every text I get and every phone call and post that I get from people who loved him, people who love me, I'm reminded that I'm not alone. So, thank you. 

But like Mary said in the last episode, even though we know they're with God, we miss them so much, we still grieve. And I just wanted to share this message for all those bereaved parents out there. Those of you who trust in God, I know you hang onto the fact that your kids are safe and at home, like I do.  Thank God we have God.

But for those of you who don't have a personal relationship with God, my heart breaks for you.  Grieving with the hope of seeing them again is hard enough. I struggled in the beginning wondering about Sean, is he in heaven? He grew up in church and everyone that knew him, saw that light in him. Even at such a young age, he had the love of God in him. And then as he got older, he began to live out what he believed. That's the real evidence of being a Christian, walking the walk.

And then as a teenager, he veered off the path a little and I was afraid I prayed and prayed. And then one day he didn't wake up. I was a mess. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat. I was unsure about his eternal fate. You don't want to find yourself in a situation like that.

Then I prayed again and I asked God to give me evidence of his salvation. Tell me if he's good. So, I can rest easy knowing that he's with God. And then one day I got the courage to open his laptop and look around as I prayed for revelation of the truth. And there it was, it just jumped out at me there was this meme on his computer that I had never seen before. “It is a well with my soul,” it said.  My sweet, old soul son. He never even heard that hymn as far as I knew, but it was one of my favorites and I wondered why would that be on his computer? Why?  What significance was it to him? And then I realized it was for me.  It was from God.  It was answered prayer. I had just prayed and asked God to give me confirmation that he was with him. It is well with my soul, mom.

In the last episode, I shared a story as I talked with Mary, about how my dad heard Sean say, “it's okay, grandpa, I'm okay” as his body laid still in the ER, he was gone out ready, but my dad got confirmation that his grandson is OK. And I got confirmation that he's okay on that day. And then countless times since then.  

And then this weekend in church, our worship band sang that song. It is well.  I haven't heard them sing that song in a while. Thank you, God for reminding me than it is well with his soul.

So today I know there's a party going on in heaven with all the best foods and music and a gorgeous 17-year-old boy named Sean. Who's going to arrive in his vintage Nova SS with his guitar in the back seat.

I know, that I know, that I know, he is good. He's good. And he's with God and God is good. So, if you don't know him, you need to meet him. He's the God of all comfort. And he's ready to comfort you with an unimaginable peace that will sustain you. Even when it hurts. He'll be there beside you and walk you through your valleys.  He'll never leave us or forsake us.

Happy birthday, Sean. I miss you. 

Thanks for listening.